Breathe.

The past couple of weeks has been overwhelming, to say the least.

Work has been very unforgiving. My to-do list just seems to be never-ending; it’s like the more I do, the longer my to-do list gets. Plus, the passive-aggressiveness I have to deal with on the daily basis. The combination of it both can really get into your nerves.

I just feel like my work is taking over my life, like there is nothing more there is than work. Like on the weekdays, all I could do was work, sleep, repeat. When the weekend finally comes, I’ll try to catch up on my sleep but I can never seem to be energised. In fact, I’ll feel much more fatigued than I already was.

Not to mention, the anxiety I feel as the weekend comes to an end. Which is why I am here, typing this away. I know I tell myself to be kinder to myself this year and to count all the blessing I have. But with this paralysing anxiety, it can be hard to see the positive side of things.

I know there are so many things I could do to make myself feel a little better, a little happier. I know. But when you are paralysed with stress and anxiety, all you want to do is to just lay there and do nothing. That self-denial is almost like a coping mechanism; to escape from it all, even just for a moment.

I realised now why I watch shows so much – I needed to escape from reality.

If I could just walk away from it all, just like that…I would. You have no idea how many times at work where I just wish I could walk away from it all. To wave the white flag, say “I’m done.” and not care about the consequence of it all.

But of course, realistically that’s not the solution.

So what is the solution?

Author: Trixia

Just here , trying to find my place in the world.

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